


i see what i should have from the start

by iittaliia



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Bickering, Canon Compliant, First Kiss, First Time, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Overuse of italics, Porn With Plot, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:28:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21904501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iittaliia/pseuds/iittaliia
Summary: Suddenly there’s five pairs of eyes on Richie and at least two people are saying something, and from the corner of his eyes Richie can see Bill standing up, but Richie is not paying attention to anything other than Eddie as his mind simultaneously goes blank and is filled with so many different memories that are flushing in like the fucking dam broke.He goes to open his mouth to say something, anything, maybe a joke or a witty comment or literally just a hello, but what comes out is -”I have to go.”
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 12
Kudos: 266





	i see what i should have from the start

**Author's Note:**

> I have never read the book or watched the miniseries, and I’ve also never seen the new films but still somehow found myself obsessed with these idiots. I think I got their personalities down, but my interpretations of them comes mainly from other fics, so I'm not actually sure how correct I am.
> 
> Also, English it not my first language and I have one braincell so I’m basically illiterate anyway. I’ve tried to proofread this but honestly at this point words have no meaning anymore, but if you see any major issues please let me know!

He recognizes Beverly immediately and not only because she’s the only girl in the group. She’s sitting with her back towards the door, but her hair is still short and bright and the way she’s holding herself up screams Beverly Marsh, the firm posture that says ’ _try me bitch_ ’, while also being somehow delicate and gentle.

On the other side of her there’s Bill who looks older, obviously, but still as handsome and strong as ever, and Richie immediately knows that absolutely nothing has changed, Bill’s still their leader and Richie is still as loyal to him as he was 27 years ago.

Then his eyes move over over to someone who is _definitely_ not Ben Hanscom, because Ben Hanscom was a chubby kid with kind eyes and not whoever this Greek God sitting next to Bill was. But as soon as Richie finishes that though the guy who’s escaped from an underwear catalogue shoots a shy glance at Bev and oh _shit_ it _is_ Haystack.

There’s no one else at the table and Richie is about to make his entrance since miraculously no one’s noticed his arrival yet, and he’s _aching_ to talk to pretty much the only friends he’s ever had, and also ask where the fuck the rest of them are.

But before he has time to do that there’s a sound of a door opening and suddenly laughing Mike Hanlon is walking out of presumably the bathroom that Richie hadn’t noticed before, and someone’s yelling ”Oh my _God_ , did you just _touch that handle_ , do you even know -”

Eddie.

The other man stops dead in his tracks, eyes immediately locking to Richie’s who’s staring right back, blood running cold, because that’s _Eddie_ , Eddie who opens his mouth to breathe out ” _Richie_?”. 

Suddenly there’s five pairs of eyes on Richie and at least two people are saying something, and from the corner of his eyes Richie can see Bill standing up, but Richie is not paying attention to anything other than Eddie as his mind simultaneously goes blank and is filled with so many different memories that are flushing in like the fucking dam broke. 

He goes to open his mouth to say something, _anything_ , maybe a joke or a witty comment or literally just a hello, but what comes out is - 

”I have to go.”

And he does. For a brief second Richie sees the confusion and hurt flash over Eddie’s face before he turns around and bolts the fuck out of the restaurant.

He can’t do this. He can’t believe he ever thought he could, can’t believe he came to this stupid town to begin with. What the fuck was he _thinking_? As if he could what, waltz in to a nice little reunion and joke and catch up with his friends, with _Eddie_ , as if their whole lives weren't based on a lie build on forgetting everything that mattered.

Richie doesn’t know where he’s going and he’s sure someone will follow and God please don’t let it be Eddie, _please_ let it be anyone but him. 

He walks quicker.

The memories keep coming back and fuck, Richie thought he’d already remembered a lot since Mike’s call but clearly not, because apparently his mind had worked extra hard on forgetting Eddie, to make sure to really make their reunion as traumatic as possible.

Richie turns a corner and another memory comes rushing in and suddenly he knows where he’s going. He picks up his pace again and then there’s footsteps behind him, like someone jogging to catch up and Richie honestly wishes it’d be the fucking _clown_ at this point and not -

”Jesus Christ Richie you’re such a piece of _shit_ , can you slow the fuck down, _Jesus_ are you all legs?”

Richie stops.

”Maybe not in the middle of the road you _moron_ ”, Eddie exclaims from somewhere behind him, sounding very out of breath and Richie immediately feels bad because _shit_ is Eddie about to have an asthma attack because of him? But when Richie doesn’t hear the now re-familiar sound of an inhaler going off, he slowly turns around to look at Eddie, who’s stopped some meters away from him on the side of the road like the sensible person who is.

Richie stares.

It’s Eddie, all right. It’s a 27 years older version, sure, but he looks so familiar that Richie can’t believe that three days ago he wouldn’t have recognized him at all. He looks sensible and adult and like he has his life together with his shirt buttoned all the way up, the collar meeting with his maybe a day old stubble and _that’s new_. Richie remembers Eddie whining about puberty being a bitch, and how even though he’d shave it off _immediately_ he would have still _liked_ to get some facial hair to not feel like such a kid. 

Richie can see crows feet around Eddie’s eyes and there’s laugh lines around his mouth and he wonders if those are just from life, or if they are from a happy life that’s been filled with laughter and joy, and Richie’s heart aches so much that he briefly wonders if he might be going into cardiac arrest. 

But he isn’t, because life’s cruel and won’t give him a way out of this, and Eddie is looking at him with a frown and Richie wants to kiss the wrinkle between his eyebrows because it’s been 27 years and apparently nothing has fucking changed.

”You’re the only person I’ve ever loved”, Richie says, blurts out because that’s not what he meant to say, at all, _ever_. But he can’t take it back now, and in a surprising turn of events - he doesn’t want to.

Something’s been eating him up inside for 27 years without him even _knowing_ about it, and now that it’s out in the open - even if only accidentally - Richie feels like he can finally _breathe_.

Eddie’s eyes are getting comedically wide and under any other circumstance Richie would say something about how _he_ is supposed to be the one with big eyes behind coke bottle classes, but the words don’t feel right.

”That -” Eddie starts, but his mouth is dry and voice hoarse so he tries again. ”That can’t be right.”

Richie lets out an unattractive noise that’s something between a laugh and a snort. ”And how would you know, you haven’t been around.”

”Exactly!” Eddie sounds slightly hysterical now. ”I _haven’t_ been around so I _can’t_ be the only person you’ve ever…”

”Well, you are, because as it would turn out, if you fall in love in the ripe old age of _thirteen_ and then forget and repress your whole childhood and in connection the person you love, turns out that the love just goes on hold for 27 years only to resurface in the middle of a Chinese restaurant.”

Something changes in Eddie’s expression and Richie is suddenly hit in the face with his own words. While he hadn’t meant to tell Eddie about loving him at _all_ , he most certainly hadn’t meant to tell Eddie about _still_ loving him. 

Oh well, in for a penny, in for a pound. 

”I didn't tell you so something would change", Richie adds and lets out a humorless laugh that sounds accidental. "I mean - there's nothing _to_ change, it's been 27 years and - you're married.”

He has a ring. Eddie has a fucking ring on his finger and how the _fuck_ did Richie not see that before? He can’t believe it took him _this_ long to see it, since now it was the only thing he could focus on. It was a simple gold band, nothing fancy or exciting, but Richie still felt like it was shining brighter than anything he's ever seen, the glimmer mocking him. 

Eddie's right hand goes to touch it, his fingers fidgeting with it like it's a nervous habit he has and it kicks Richie's mouth back into action, because the last thing he needs is for Eddie to say something stupid like _apologize_ for having done something all forty years old well functioning people fucking do. Richie doesn't need Eddie to say ’ _oh yes, we're going on ten years, got some nice gifts from our kids because yes, we have kids and we are a very happy family_ ’. Richie doesn't fucking need to hear that, so before Eddie has time to say it he's quick to start talking again.

”I mean of course you are, why the fuck wouldn’t you be?” Richie doesn’t mean to sound bitter but he does and he fucking _hates_ it. ”Like I said, 27 years, I don’t know you - _this_ you, or your life -” Richie’s hand shoots up, finger angrily pointing at Eddie who’d opened his mouth. ”- shut the _fuck_ up, that doesn’t mean I can’t love you because even if I don’t know _shit_ that’s the only fucking thing that I’ve ever been sure about in my fucking life, so -”

”I love you too.”

Eddie voice doesn’t waver, but he looks just about ready to vibrate out of his skin. Richie fees like he’s been dumbed into a bucket of ice. 

”Oh no you don’t.”  


” _No_ I _don’t_?” Eddie is frowning now and he looks at Richie like _he_ ’s the one who’s talking nonsense.  


”You don’t, want to know why?” 

Richie doesn’t wait for an answer, raising his hand up and counting down his fingers. ”Well for starters I’m the absolute _worst_ fucking human being on this planet. I drink _way_ too much, I’ve punched multiple people, I never fucking tip properly because you know what they say about how gays can’t do math? That’s me!” He throws his arms to the side now as if shoving himself off. ”A repressed fucking _flaming_ homosexual who has based his whole career on different misogynist jokes of I don’t even _know_ what because I don’t write my own stuff since being a traumatized gay is not nearly as entertaining as jacking off to everything that fucking moves _except_ other guys because that doesn’t fucking sell.”

”Shut up.” Eddie sounds pissed off, and his words sound like a warning but when has Richie ever paid any attention to those?

”No, I wasn’t done”, he says instead. ”I can’t hold up any kind of meaningful relationships to save my life and all my exes talk absolute shit about me - and for valid reasons because they’re all women and I’m _gay_ , and I mean did you miss the part where I said you’re the only person I’ve _ever_ loved? _And_ I -”

”Would you shut the _fuck_ up!” Eddie yells now, looking angry. Richie does this time, because Eddie has taken a step towards him, now also standing on the road and Richie is trying to process Eddie putting himself in risk - even as minimalistic as _standing on an empty road_ \- because of him.

”Eddie…” Richie starts, not knowing where the sentence is going but he doesn’t have to since Eddie speaks over him.

” _No_ , you fucking listen”, he starts, sounding furious. ”The first thing you do after seeing me for the first time in 27 years is fucking _leave_? You made me fucking run after you in this piece of shit town only to tell me you love me - not even a _hello_ first you dramatic piece of shit - and when I say it back you start talking shit about yourself so I would what, _stop loving you_?”  


”You don’t -”  


”Say I don’t love you one more time and I swear to _God_ …” Richie doesn’t know what Eddie will do but he shuts up just in case, knowing full well what he was capable of as a _child_.

Eddie takes a deep breath. ”It’s been 27 years and you’re right, we don’t _know_ these versions of us but you know what they say about how loving someone is a choice you make every day?" Richie doesn’t do anything to confirm that he’s heard this theory, but Eddie doesn’t seem to care. ”I made the choice to love you 27 years ago when you were insufferable, obnoxious, loudmouthed _jackass_ who was a constant pain in my ass and the fucking bane to my entire existence, and I knew all that about you and still thought ’ _oh great, wouldn’t mind spending the rest of my life with him_ ’, so if you think that not knowing how to _tip_ would make me drop you after _finally_ getting you back then you’re fucking dumber than you look.”

There’s a moment of silence now, so Richie decides to try and talk, but he doesn’t get further than taking a breath in when Eddie goes off again, like he’d just remembered something.

” _Oh_! And I did get married, to my fucking _mother_ , and _this_ -” he waves his left hand, the ring glimmering in the streetlights, still mocking. ”- is coming off right the fuck now”, Eddie continues as he yanks the ring away and throws it blindly to the side. It makes a clinking noise a few times before fading out and Richie stares after it, eyes wide and disbelieving, and his mouth has a mind of its own again because the first thing he says is - ”Was that expensive?”  


” _That’s_ what you focus on?” Eddie exclaims, sounding out of breath. ”I want to fucking _throttle_ you, Jesus fucking _Christ_ you’re unbelievable.”

Richie turns his gaze away from the ring that is long gone by now, going back to looking at Eddie who does look about ready to actually throttle him, so Richie swallows down whatever joke he’s mind had started to build up.

They are both breathing heavy, staring at each other like they’ve just done something actually strenuous and not just yelling like teenagers. Richie wonders briefly if this is the moment they should kiss, if he should just close the distance between them and _kiss_ Eddie like he’s wanted to all his life.

He doesn’t. 

Because Richie doesn’t know if Eddie would want that, because loving someone and wanting to be with them were two different things, and Richie is fucking terrified to find out if it’s like that for Eddie.

Another moment passes and the tension is getting too much and it’s uncomfortable and they are _still_ standing on the road, and even if Richie doesn’t care about his safety now Eddie’s also stepped into the minimal danger like the dumbass he is, so Richie’s the one to break the silence.

”What now?”  


”What do you mean what now?”  


”I mean - what now?”, Richie repeats, throwing his hands around in emphasis. ”We’re in this shitty town and I'm in love with you and you _obviously_ have some kind of brain damage -” his tone is teasing now, surprising himself too, and Eddie is quick to quip in with a familiar ”oh _fuck_ you” before Richie finishes with ”- so, what now?”

Eddie is quiet for a breath until he shrugs nonchalantly, like it’s obvious. ”Well, I think you summed it up great last time. We're gonna kill this fucking clown.”

Richie lets out a laugh because oh yeah, _the_ _clown_. He's about to crack a joke but Eddie shivers suddenly.

”Are you cold?” Richie asks, and Eddie nods, going to place his hands on his upper arms that are only covered by a hoodie, trying to get them warmer without rubbing on them because ’ _don’t you know that is super bad for you, it breaks your skin and how is_ _that_ _helpful_ ’.  


”Well yeah it’s fucking freezing, so maybe before going to hunt for a demonic clown we could just go back to the townhouse a bit?”

Eddie sounds tired, all of his previous fight and anger gone from his voice like they hadn’t just been yelling at each other a moment ago. Richie sneaks a glance towards his side, where he knows the kissing bridge is, some way away - or at least _was_. He wants to know if it still is, wants to know if his shy confession from all those years ago is still there for all to see. 

But Eddie is right, it is freezing and Richie is exhausted. Who would have thought that reconnecting with the love of your life after 27 years would really take a toll on one's psyche?

”Yeah, let's go.”

**~*~*~**

Eddie sends a quick text to Mike, letting everyone know that now that _someone_ \- he said this part out loud to Richie with a pointed glare - was done having a hissy fit they would be making their way back to the townhouse, and they would see everyone tomorrow.

They are quiet as they walk, the silence heavy between them. Richie didn’t think he’d walked _that_ far and Derry really isn’t a big town, but still it feels like every minute drags on for way longer than it should because Richie doesn’t know what to _do_.

Or well, he does. He wants to hold Eddie's hand. He's always wanted to and he knows he's done it before, did it all the time when they were kids, but somehow actually doing it now seems to be too difficult. So far he hasn’t touched Eddie at all, and his whole body is aching for contact, and not only because it’s _Eddie_ and he always wants to touch Eddie, but because he’s so touch starved it’s not even funny.

Richie wants to laugh, because the situation is absurd. They have exchanged multiple insults and confessions and fucking ’ _I love you_ ’s, but they haven’t fucking touched each other and Richie is awfully aware of every inch that’s separating them, and it’s absolutely ridiculous and why the fuck is he being such a coward?

He reaches out, fingers just barely brushing against Eddie’s, the touch making Richie feel like he’s on live wire, before the flashlights of a car come from seemingly nowhere, making Richie immediately take a step to the side, towards the fucking _road_ that has a _car_ coming. 

”Dude, what the -” Eddie reaches his hand out and grabs Richie by the arm, yanking him back to the side as the car drives by and away. Richie stares after it even though it wasn’t even a near miss, and thinks about how he’d apparently rather get hit by a car than get caught trying to hold Eddie’s hand. 

Talk about fucking issues.

Richie is brought back to reality when his shoulder is being punched, hard.

”The fuck?” He yelps, turning to look back at Eddie, his hand going to rub over the punched spot.  


”My question exactly! Are you _trying_ to fucking die?” Eddie doesn’t wait for an answer before waving his hand towards the side and oh, Richie can see the townhouse.

”Because if you want to get fucking run over that bad at _least_ have the courtesy to wait until we’re by the parking lot so _I_ can have to honor of doing it, you fucking asshole.”

Richie snorts. ”Please, as if you would.”

Eddie shoots him an unamused look that says ’ _don’t test me_ ’, and starts walking again without another word. Richie stays put for a beat longer before his brain kicks back into action and he catches up with a few strikes. Eddie glares at him and Richie still wants to hold his hand but thinks that he might get punched again, and even though it wouldn’t be so bad he feels like he should go through a different route to get a rise out of Eddie this time.

So he pushes his hands inside his pockets - just to take away any lingering temptation for hand holding - and smirks down at Eddie who is staring at the townhouse, probably counting down the distance.

”So”, Richie starts ”marrying your mother, huh?”

It’s not the best he can do, and the whole _oh Eddie is married_ seems like a dangerous territory to go to, but the ring is somewhere in a ditch behind them and mom-jokes are his go-to, so he takes the risk. It pays off when Eddie sends daggers to his way and snaps ”Not a word.”

It’s so familiar that Richie just smiles back, teeth and all before winking.

”That’s _kinky_ Spaghetti, didn’t know you had it in you.”  


”I _will_ kill you”, Eddie deadpans, and it’s so matter-of-fact that Richie snorts again.  


”Promises, promises.”

Eddie shoots his leg out suddenly and Richie trips, falling forward with just enough time to catch a glimpse at the self-satisfied smile on Eddie’s face. 

When he gets his balance back and straightens himself back up Eddie is already at the townhouse, walking up the steps to the door. He turns back to look at Richie with an amused look on his face.

”You coming?” He asks, and Richie rolls his eyes as he jogs to catch up, and it feels natural, the teasing and trying to get a rise out of the other, so he doesn’t even think about his words before they are already out of his mouth.

”If you’re offering.”

Eddie freezes, hand on the door handle, and Richie can see his shoulders tense and he wants to take it back _immediately_. He can’t though, and he can’t even come up with anything else to say to make the reappeared tension go away, so he just stands there, at the bottom of the steps and stares at Eddie’s back, waiting for a response. 

Richie doesn’t know what he wanted the response to be, but it wasn’t for Eddie to just take a breath, turn the handle and pull the door open without a word. He goes in first, and Richie has to take two steps at a time so he can catch the door before it closes, afraid he might never see Eddie again if he loses sight of him now.

But Eddie is inside, just standing in the middle of the reception like a character from a video game whose action just got cancelled. Richie closes the door behind him, taking extra good care on making sure it closes properly, partly because of the clown - even though what use would a _door_ do? - and partly so he can have few extra seconds of not facing Eddie just yet. 

When Richie does turn around Eddie is looking at him with this expression that Richie’s never seen on his face before. The tension is still there, but in the quiet and soft light of the reception it feels different from the uncomfortable one from outside.

It scares Richie like nothing ever has.

So he does what he always does - cracks a stupid joke.

”Well, I think it’s about time for me to head up to my room. Can’t keep Mrs. K waiting for too long can I?” 

Something flashes over Eddie’s face before he rolls his eyes, but it seems a bit forced and the ’ _oh fuck you_ ’ sounds off. Richie chooses to ignore that and instead walks over to the stairs leading up to the second floor and his room, and is surprised to have Eddie follow him a few steps behind. He turns to raise a brow at him and Eddie gives him and unimpressed look.

”Where do you think _my_ room is located, dumbass?” Eddie asks and when Richie doesn’t answer he walks past him and up the stairs, brushing against Richie in a way that makes Richie hold on to the railing because he is _pathetic_.

When Richie gets up the stairs he can see Eddie staring very intently at the evacuation plan on the wall, and it gives Richie a great opportunity to stare at him for the first time in a proper lighting. It makes his heart _ache_ because he looks so much like Eddie but just _more_. He’s holding himself up the same way and he’s still smaller than most and even though his hoodie is maybe a size or two too big on him Richie can tell he’s still lean but in good shape, that he takes care of his health and body because of course he does, he’s _Eddie_. He’s not wearing teeny tiny shorts which is a shame, but his jeans are fitted just right to showcase his legs in a way that would have made teenage Richie pop a boner right then and there, and it wouldn’t take too much imagination to get present Richie there either. 

”Eds, I -”

Richie doesn’t mean to say anything and he doesn’t know where the sentence is going, but he doesn’t have to because Eddie turns to look at him with a scowl, more out of habit than actual annoyance probably. 

”Don’t call me that”, he shoots back and Richie’s face must do something funny because Eddie’s scowl disappears and there’s that _look_ again, the same from downstairs, and suddenly Richie is feeling hot all over and he really needs to get out of this hallway and in his room. He tears his gaze away from Eddie and turns to his right, where - thank _fuck_ \- his room is located, first one from the stairs. He pretends not to notice that his hands are shaking as he fumbles to his pocket, taking out the honest to god _key_ he was given earlier. He’s not sure which is more intense, Eddie’s stare on him or the tension between them, and Richie briefly curses himself for _not_ reading the evacuation plan, because he could really use an escape route right about now before he does something _stupid_ like -

”Oh _fuck_ this”, Eddie says somewhere to Richie’s left and suddenly his arm is being grabbed and he’s being turned around, pushed straight against the door he was about to open with such force that Richie briefly wonders how often Eddie works out, because it’s Eddie pushing him, Eddie getting on his toes - and that’s so fucking cute and Richie would tease the shit out of him under any other circumstances, but right now he’s too busy with thinking ’ _what the fuck is happening_ ’ before Eddie’s lips crash into his and the thinking stops altogether. 

Richie takes a second too long to answer, resulting in Eddie yanking him down harder, groaning ”Richie c’m _on_ ” against his lips, and nothing’s ever kicked Richie into action quite so quickly. He wraps his arms around Eddie’s middle and lifts him up long enough to switch their position, pinning Eddie against the wall instead and their bodies flush together, earning a groan from the other man.

”Fuck, _Eds_ …” Richie says back, breathes against Eddie’s lips and continues kissing him like his life depends on it - and Richie thinks it just might because he doesn’t know when he’s ever felt this _alive_.

”Don’t -” Eddie sounds breathless in the best kind of way ”- fucking call me that”.

Richie’s always thought Eddie doesn’t mean it when he says that, not really, but now he knows it for a fact because Eddie is licking into his mouth and his other hand is in Richie’s hair, fingers entwined with his curls like he’s making sure Richie won’t try to stand back up. 

And _fuck_ , Richie really doesn’t want to straighten himself up, but he is an old man now and his back is already starting to hurt from leaning down because Eddie’s stopped standing on his toes so their height difference is really making itself known. He’s about to start leaning back, partly for air and partly so he can get blood flowing back to his brain, but Eddie seems to notice his intentions because he lets out a whine that finalizes the fact that Richie’s brain is _never_ going to get blood ever again, and then Eddie is suddenly moving his hands from behind Richie’s head, wrapping his arms around his shoulders instead and Richie can _definitely_ get behind this. He’s just about to start testing all the different noises he could get out of Eddie just by kissing him, when the other man suddenly presses their foreheads together, detaching their lips long enough to breath out ”You better not fucking drop me”.

Richie has no time to question what that means because Eddie jumps up to wrap his legs around him, and it’s not a good position because he didn’t jump high enough, but Richie’s hands move on autopilot and he grabs Eddie from underneath his thighs, pulling him up so suddenly that their faces move apart properly for the first time since they started making out in the hallway like teenagers. Eddie’s lips are red and swollen and Richie wants to _wreck_ him.

”Oh my God”, Eddie says and he probably didn’t mean to, as he grabs Richie’s face again, pulling him closer with his legs that are now wrapped around Richie’s middle. Richie goes willingly, pressing their bodies even closer than before and holds onto Eddie’s thighs so hard that he might leave bruises. The thought is so hot that Richie involuntarily grinds up and oh my God that’s definitely Eddie being just as hard as he is, his erection pressing against Richie’s lower stomach. 

Eddie lets out a whine, an honest to god whine into Richie’s mouth and he grinds up again, this time with every intention to get Eddie to make that sound again. Eddie does open his mouth and Richie’s just about to congratulate himself on mission accomplished, but Eddie doesn’t whine, he says -

”We have to... we have to slow down.”

It’s not what Richie wanted to hear, definitely not, but he can’t be too disappointed because Eddie’s voice sounds used and hoarse and Richie’s never come from just dirty talk but with Eddie he definitely could. 

”May I remind you that _you_ are the one that kissed _me_ ”, Richie points out, moving to kiss his way down Eddie’s jaw to his neck because it’s _right there_.  


”Well I didn’t expect you to grab me like some kind of a wild animal”, Eddie shoots back, sounding so out of breath that it makes Richie feel giddy.  


”You’re the one who climbed me like I’m a fucking tree”, Richie argues, and finally - with great effort - starts detaching himself from Eddie because no matter how much he’d love to keep going Eddie did say he wanted to slow down and there’s not many - if any - things Richie wouldn’t do if Eddie asked. 

”That’s on _you_ for growing like three more inches since high school, like how is that necessary”, Eddie grumbles back, leaning his head against the wall with a thud. His legs are still wrapped around Richie.   


”No, that’s on _you_ for _not_ growing even _during_ high school, honestly there’s taller kids in preschool.” Richie moves his hand slightly, going to rub circles to Eddie’s thigh with his thumb. Eddie’s features soften and for a second he just stares at Richie with a blissful expression before he seems to remember that yes, they were bickering.   


”Ha ha very funny dickface”, Eddie quips, with absolutely no heat behind it, and leans closer to kiss Richie again.

It’s slower and sweeter this time, the urgency gone even though Richie is _still_ holding Eddie up against the wall.

”I’ve missed you”, Eddie whispers against Richie’s lips after a moment of languid kissing, and because Richie doesn’t have a filter he replies with ”No, you haven’t”, sounding sadder than he’d like. 

Eddie leans back again, looking Richie with an expression Richie can’t quite name, and says ”Every day, asshole” while going to unwrap his legs from around Richie. Richie lets him, because even though Eddie is small he’s not _that_ small, and Richie’s arms have started to ache from carrying his weight. ’ _I have to start working out if I get to have this_ ’ Richie thinks for a brief second before he shots that train of thoughts down _immediately_ , because suddenly the ache in his arms is nothing compared to the one in his chest. 

Eddie seems to notice something change in Richie’s expression because he takes Richie’s hand in his, squeezing it lightly before letting go in favor or leaning over to get the long forgotten key off the floor, where Richie’s dropped it without even noticing.

”Well this is a sight I don’t mind looking at”, Richie says in an exaggerated sultry voice, because he has absolutely no filter and it’s also true, and Eddie straightens himself up immediately, turning to glare at Richie in a lovely shade of red.

”This your room then?” he asks, already putting the key in the lock. Richie snickers and goes to stand right behind Eddie, lips brushing against his ear.  


”Very forward of you Mr. Kaspbrak, at least buy me dinner first.”  


”Fuck you dude”, Eddie shoots back instantly and he elbows Richie on the stomach. ”You were grinding against me not five minutes ago, and literally _just_ _now_ stared at my ass.”  


”Po-tay-to, po-tah-to”, Richie replies as he rubs his stomach and Eddie turns to stare at him.   


”That doesn’t even apply to - you know what, whatever, go brush your fucking teeth.” He’s managed to open the door, and he steps aside to give room to Richie who in turn clicks his heels  together and puts his hand to his head in salute.  


”Aye-aye Captain Spaghetti!”  


”Do you _ever_ fucking shut up?” Eddie groans and grabs the front of Richie's shirt to throw him in the room.  
”I mean I can think of multiple ways to -”  


”Beep fucking beep, dickhead.”

Richie cackles all the way to the bathroom.

When he gets back out, this time with minty fresh breath, there is a light on his bedside lamp and Eddie is sitting on his bed. Realistically Richie had known that Eddie had come to the room with him, but it still makes him stop in the doorway to see Eddie sitting there, waiting for him. Their eyes meet and the question from earlier comes back again - _what now_?

Eddie seems to have a better idea than Richie, because suddenly he’s standing up and to Richie’s surprise walking back to the door.

”What are you -” Richie starts, because this evening has been a fucking whirlwind and for once he’d like to know what the fuck was going on.

Eddie turns to look at him and his face immediately falls. ”I’m not leaving!” he yelps quickly, easing the first set of worry off of Richie. ”I just realized that my toothbrush isn’t here because _why would it be_ , and I’ve never gone to bed without brushing my teeth, so...” he explains, looking apologetic and Richie feels better.

”You could just borrowed mine, you know”, he still offers as Eddie’s already opened the door, because no matter the circumstances he doesn’t like to see Eddie go.

Eddie scrunches up his face in disgust as he steps out of the room.  
”That is disgusting, Richie, do you even know -”  


”We were literally _just_ making out!”, Richie defends himself because he doesn’t have to hear however many different bacterias are in a toothbrush. Eddie pulls another face. ”Don’t remind me, I don’t know where your mouth has been.”  


”On you.”  


”Before that.”  


”On your -”  


”Finish that sentence and I’m not coming back.”

Richie closes his mouth immediately and Eddie looks smug as he closes the door behind him.

He does come back, and even though Richie knew he would he’s still having a hard time coming around the fact. Richie’s sitting on the bed now, after pacing around muttering _what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck_ for a bit and changing into his sleepwear - clean pair of boxers and an old t-shirt. Similar attire he expected Eddie to wear but no, of course Eddie is standing by his doorway in striped pajamas, looking comfortable and so fucking cute that Richie can’t help but wonder how his dick is misinterpreting that as being hot and sexy. He regrets only wearing boxers now.

Eddie closes the door behind him, the only light coming from the bedside table now. Richie’s pretty sure the lamp is covered in dust so the brightness isn’t the greatest, but he’s actually thankful for that, suddenly feeling self-conscious. He knows he’s not in _bad_ shape per se, but also not the greatest. His legs and arms are definitely not as muscular as they should be and the t-shirt is hiding a small belly, or a _dad-bod_ as the kids call it these days.

And Eddie just _stands_ there, leans against the door and looks at him, and Richie gets a flashback to literally ten minutes ago when he was doing the same thing but they were much closer then, and Richie doesn’t know how to address that.

Seems like he doesn’t have to, because a second later Eddie is walking over to him. ”Scoot up”, he says and waves his hands in a motion that says the same. Richie gets the point, or at least he thinks he does, and he scoots.

But then out of fucking _nowhere_ Eddie is straddling him, pressing his knees on either side of Richie’s thighs and _sitting on him_ , and Richie definitely had _not_ gotten the point or otherwise he would have done some mental gymnastics to prepare himself for this.

”Hey Rich, you’re looking a little pale there.” Eddie sounds amused and Richie wants to smack him so he does, but somehow ends up grabbing Eddie’s waist instead. Eddie lets out a satisfied sound at that which goes straight to Richie’s dick, and it’s so embarrassing how hot and bothered he is by some making out and this, whatever _this_ is - he’s forty fucking years old. 

”You said we should slow down”, Richie hears himself say and honestly, why has he never learned to shut the fuck up?  


”I did, because we were in the _hallway_ ”, Eddie replies, saying it in a way one might explain to a child why sticking a tongue to a frozen pole is not a great idea. Richie always had trouble understanding that, and he’s having trouble with this too.  


”There’s literally only four other people staying in this place and we know all of them, so -”  


” _Exactly_ ” Eddie exclaims in a voice that clearly says _you’re being an idiot_. ”I could literally never look at them _ever_ if they’d fucking walked in on that, you were _carrying_ me!” Eddie honest to god hisses now, and maybe Richie would take him seriously if he wasn’t currently burrowing his fingers in Richie’s hair and massaging his scalp in a way that should definitely not feel as good as it does.  


”Again, _you_ jumped _me_ ”, Richie can’t help but point out and Eddie looks like he’s about to argue back so Richie doesn’t let him, instead pulls him down with the hand that’s not currently making itself familiar with the curve or Eddie’s hip. 

Eddie lets out something that sounds a lot like _finally_ , and he’s kissing Richie, licking into his mouth for a brief moment before he suddenly starts smiling in a way that gets in the way of what seemed like a great start for a steamy make out session. Richie leans back to glare at him.

”Are you grinning like a lunatic because I taste like _toothpaste_?” He asks and Eddie snorts, and it definitely shouldn’t be as attractive as it is.  


” _No_ , I’m smiling like a normal human being because I’m…” his words cut off the same moment Richie’s hand slips under his pajama top. ”…happy”, he finishes, but his voice definitely dropped an octave, sounding slightly more hoarse now. Richie smirks instead of smiling because otherwise he might get _too_ sincere and say something like ’ _I’ve never been happier than when I’m with you_ ’, and he feels like that might make the moment less sexy and more soft, so instead he settles on ”Yeah, me too”, as he moves his hand up and down Eddie’s side.

Eddie shivers and closes his eyes as he leans closer, their noses brushing. 

”Why don’t you show me?” He asks and Richie would tease him for quoting a line from every porno _ever_ , but at that moment Eddie grinds down and makes contact with Richie’s dick and he has to bite down a groan before he’s crashing their lips back together. His other hand is still at the back of Eddie’s neck and the other one is rubbing Eddie’s side, getting bolder by the second to move to his front, to touch his stomach and - are those _abs_?

”What the _fuck_ ”, Richie breathes out and it’s an accident but doesn’t make him mean the words any less, and Eddie seems to notice where his hand has stopped. He blushes.  


”No, shut up, it’s not -”  


”Shut the _fuck_ up, are you _kidding_ me do you really - oh my God let me _see_ why the fuck are you still wearing this, why would you ever wear anything _ever_ ” Richie doesn’t know what he’s saying anymore but now both of his hands are between them, trying to work on the buttons of Eddie’s pajamas. Eddie is still blushing but he doesn’t seem to mind and instead leans back to give Richie more room to work with. 

It’s of no use because all the blood in Richie’s dick is making it very difficult to concentrate on his fine motor skills.

”If you were just going to sit on me immediately the _fuck_ would you put on clothes for?” He groans and finally gets a button undone.  


”I wasn’t going to walk here naked!” Eddie quips back, sounding far too scandalized for someone whose immediate first reaction after seeing Richie’s bare thighs was to _sit on them_.  


”You could have gone shirtless!”  


”It’s a _set_.”

Eddie says it like it’s the most obvious reason in the world for him to put on more clothes for the sole purpose of taking them off a moment later, and it’s so painfully Eddie that Richie feels dumb for even questioning him. He really should have known he’d be like this.

”It’s a pain in the fucking _ass_ is what it is, why is there so many fucking _buttons_.”  


”Am I supposed to have fucking velcro pajamas or some shit?"  


” _No_ , you’re not supposed to have _any_ pajamas, you’re a fucking grown man.”  


”Well I sure am _grown_ but you’re not about to find that out for yourself if you -”  


”Oh my _God_ ”, Richie cries out, abandoning the buttons in favor of unceremoniously shoving his hand down Eddie’s pants. Eddie lets out a yelp that quickly changes into something akin to ”Oh fuck, _Richie_ ”, when Richie’s hand wraps around him.

It’s Richie’s first time touching another person’s dick - that one frat party doesn’t count because it lasted all of three seconds before he profoundly threw up and dropped all the classes he shared with the guy - but surprisingly this doesn’t freak him out. He didn’t mean to do it, not like this at least, so sudden and without any actual conversation about what was actually happening between them, but he can’t say he’s sorry he did it because Eddie is nuzzling against his neck in a way that makes Richie go crazy. 

” _Rich_ ” Eddie breaths out and and Richie realizes he has just been holding Eddie without actually _doing_ anything, so he tentatively starts moving his hand and the sound Eddie lets out goes straight to Richie’s own dick. He still asks ”yeah?” Because one can never be too sure of someone’s sexual preferences, and Eddie answers his non-question question by licking a stripe against his neck before pressing a kiss under his jawline. 

It gives Richie the confidence to start moving his hand more, to start flicking his wrist in a way that he likes himself, and after he moves his thumb over Eddie’s tip it becomes just that much easier since Eddie is attaching his mouth firmly against Richie’s neck before spurting out precum, making everything nice and slick.

Richie’s delighted, but he also kind of still wants to see Eddie really bad and they haven’t gotten any clothes off yet, the one unopened button being the only progress so far. But he also doesn’t want to take his hand off Eddie’s pants so he’d be able to chuck his own shirt off, and even trying do Eddie’s buttons with only one free hand would be useless, so he moves to grab Eddie’s hand instead, detaching his fingers from the front of Richie’s shirt that they’d grabbed at some point.

”Eds, can you…”, Richie starts, but at that moment Eddie moves his hips so he brushes against Richie again, and Richie doesn’t even mind that it makes his wrist bend weird because that feels fucking _amazing_. Instead of bucking back against Eddie like he wants to he moves their now joined hands to Eddie’s front.

”I’m a bit busy right now”, Richie tries again, moving his thumb over Eddie’s slit, making the other man move his hips again and Richie briefly wonders if he should just stop moving his hand and let Eddie do all the work. He decides against it, but puts it to the back of his mind in the dangerous ’ _maybe later_ ’ corner. ”So if you could do me the favor of undoing these buttons -” he continues, pressing Eddie’s hand to his shirt ”- so I could see your abs, I’d really appreciate it.”

Eddie stays where he is for a beat before his brain seems to kick back in and he leans back to stare at Richie like he’s the dumbest person ever. It’s a look Richie is very familiar with, and the fact that he receives it in this context makes him feel fucking giddy. Then, without breaking the eye contact, Eddie moves his hand from Richie’s grip and his chest to the back of his neck, taking hold of the shirt and pulling it off. It looks so easy and he doesn’t even get fucking stuck like Richie knows _he_ would, and it pisses Richie off to no end, but as Eddie drops the shirt behind him Richie is faced with his _abs_ and all thoughts disappear. 

”I -” Richie blinks. "I didn’t think of that.”  
Eddie rolls his eyes. ”That’s why I’m the brains in this relationship.”

If the abs wouldn’t have already emptied Richie’s mind, this certainly did the trick.

_Relationship_.

Richie feels a tightness in his chest, the same one he felt earlier when he thought about needing to start working out in order to be able to lift Eddie easier in the future, in the future they would share together. 

Future.

Together. 

In a relationship.

Eddie moves to take Richie’s hand in his, and Richie realizes he’d reached out to touch Eddie’s stomach but hadn’t quite made contact, but he’s not even disappointed because Eddie is lacing their fingers together and giving the back of his hand a kiss, smiling at Richie way too fondly considering Richie was _still_ holding his dick, even though he’d stopped moving his hand now.

”And I’m the beauty?” Richie says after realizing he’s been quiet for way too long, and Eddie blinks in confusion before he groans and Richie is absolutely _delighted_ to notice the difference between his sexy moan and he’s exasperated one. 

” _No_ ”, Eddie says and Richie laughs because that’s a _yes_ if he’s ever heard one.  


”Oh yes I am, you think I’m sexy as hell”, he smirks and starts moving his hand again, trying to get this show back on the road. Eddie glares at him. ”I didn’t even agree with you so how did you go from beauty to _sexy_?” He questions as he moves to wrap his fingers around Richie’s wrist, the one that’s on his dick, and moves it out of his pants. 

Richie raises his brows at that because he was quite enjoying jacking Eddie off, and he would question him but he also has a reputation as a sex-symbol to uphold, so instead he says ”You didn’t have to agree my dear, actions speak louder than words! Or should I point out you climbing me, _twice_ , again, or should I phone a friend to confirm my sexiness - perhaps your mot-”

”Shut the _fuck_ up”, Eddie groans, and suddenly he’s climbing off of Richie’s lap and _what_?

”What?”

Richie would love to question further why Eddie deemed it necessary to remove himself from Richie’s lap and from all contact altogether, but then Eddie starts to shimmy himself out of his pajama bottoms and all the thoughts leave Richie’s head because those are Eddie’s bare _legs_. 

The same fucking legs Richie had spend fucking _hours_ staring at, those tiny fucking shorts hiding absolutely nothing. Of course _these_ legs look nothing like the one’s from his teenage dreams, and Richie doesn’t know if it’s good or bad but it certainly is _something_.

”You’re staring”, Eddie points out as he drops the pajamas next to the bed gently.  


”I want you to choke me with your thighs”, Richie deadpans, and it’s most definitely not a joke but Eddie lets out a surprised laugh anyway.  


”I can’t do that this far away”, Eddie says with a raise of his eyebrow and it wakes Richie up from his trance because it’s not _his fault_.

”You’re the one who moved!” Richie shrieks out, pointing an angry finger at Eddie before placing his hand on his bare ankle. He remembers that sometimes he used to do it when they were in the hammock. He’d grab Eddie’s ankle to stop him from kicking his glasses off - and, if he was feeling brave, he would keep holding it even after Eddie’d calmed down. 

Eddie seems to remember this too and he smiles fondly for a brief moment before shrugging out his defense.

”I was getting close.”

Richie wants to punch him because Eddie is so _dumb_.

”That’s the _point_ you moron”, he says instead. ”I wasn’t giving you the hand job of the century for shit and giggles.”  


”Hand job of the _century_?” Eddie’s voice raises in disbelief, but his face is getting a bit red so it seems like Richie wasn’t too much off base, but before Richie has time to point that out Eddie continues. ”You’re still wearing a shirt!”

Richie fumbles to the neckline and throws the shirt over his head. He’s not nearly as graceful as Eddie had been and the shirt does get stuck, just like Richie knew it would, but he manages, only knocking his glasses askew slightly. ”Not anymore”, he says as he throws the shirt haphazardly and it lands and gets stuck on a dresser handle. ”And get off your fucking high horse, you got rid of your clothes fucking twenty seconds ago”, he adds, because Eddie was the moron who put on a whole fucking pajama set so Richie won’t be criticized for wearing a _shirt_.

”Well fuck you, I can put them back on if you -”  


”Don’t you dare”, Richie growls, and with a strength he didn’t know he had he pulls Eddie by his ankle, making him slide to his back with a yelp.

”You _dickhead_ , I could have a bad back, the fuck you yanking me around for?”  


”You don’t have a fucking bad back, you have _abs_ ”, Richie retorts as if those are contradicting things. ”And I’m ’ _yanking you around_ ’ -” he quotes with a roll of his eyes as he goes to move over Eddie, making the other man visibly gulp. ”- because you were way too far away for what I have planned.”

Before Eddie has time to reply Richie is pressing their bodies together, their middles not quite matching perfectly but still just enough to get Eddie to breathe out a slow ' _fuuuuck_ '. 

Richie can’t believe they are both still wearing fucking underwear, can’t believe he has touched Eddie’s dick but still not actually _seen_ it, but knowing that and actually _doing_ something about it are two very different things. He’s pressed his elbows on either side of Eddie’s head and he grinds down again, now making sure their dicks brush against each other just _right_ , and Eddie grabs hold of his bicep hard enough to bruise.

”What -” Eddie starts, but his words get caught as Richie grinds down again, now lowering his whole body properly so it's covering Eddie’s. The fact that he can still do that sends shrills all the way down to his toes.

”What did you have planned?” Eddie tries again, now getting all the words out, but his voice sounds shaky and he's still gripping Richie’s arm. Richie smirks.  


”Oh, so many things Eds, you don’t even -”

”I’m not getting fucked here”, Eddie suddenly interrupts, surprising Richie enough to make him stop his current movement. ”These sheets are fucking _filthy_ and -”  


”No _shit_ moron”, Richie cuts in as Eddie tries to continue. ”I’m not in any condition to prep you when I’m like one good grind away from jizzing my fucking pants”, Richie explains as he stares at Eddie with an unimpressed look, and he probably should be embarrassed for saying that because his dick has not even been _touched_ yet, but feeling Eddie’s erection first in his hand and then _against him_ had made him feel like he was fucking fourteen again.

”Who said you would do the fucking?” Eddie argues after a beat and Richie truly wonders how he hasn’t gotten a price for being the most infuriating piece of shit on the planet.  


”Are you _kidding_? Literally you, _just_ now, or where you planning on _not_ getting fucked by someone else, I’m sure Penny-”  


”Oh my God shut the _fuck_ up, _Jesus_ ”, Eddie groans, and he lets go of Richie’s arm to throw it over his eyes. ”I was planning on blowing you but I don’t think you fucking deserve that, you asshole.”  


”Oh I for _sure_ don’t”, Richie agrees easily and he’s grinning, because Eddie was thinking of _blowing him_ and oh that’s a fucking _great_ idea.

”I’m so happy you’re the brains in this relationship” Richie murmurs against Eddie’s chest as he starts to move down his body, peppering kisses along the way. He wonders how much shit Eddie would give him for licking his abs, and pretty much immediately comes to the conclusion that he couldn’t give less of a shit, and he presses his tongue against the muscle definition that definitely shouldn’t be visible on a man their age. 

”What the -” Eddie lets out, looking down to stare at Richie. ” _This_ is what you had in mind? Licking my _stomach_?”  


”I’m doing research to find out if you’re still ticklish”, Richie says as a way of explanation. Eddie stares harder.  


”You never fucking _licked_ my _stomach_ , what kind of fucking research is this?”  


”Don’t fret my old fellow. I will make sure to forward the excel spreadsheet I will arrange from all the knowledge I’ve gathered to you posthaste.”

Richie is doing the fucking British Guy and it’s as bas as it ever was, if not somehow fucking _worse_ , and Eddie’s not sure if he wants to pull Richie up to kiss him or push him down so he can knee him on the nose. In the end he doesn’t have time to do either because suddenly Richie is pressing his lips just by his hip bone, sucking a hickey just above his underwear that are now being tucked down with Richie’s ridiculously attractively large hands. 

And all of a sudden Eddie is lying there, completely naked and harder than he’s ever been, with Richie in between his legs and - when did he open his legs?

Richie’s stopped his attack on Eddie’s lower stomach and is now looking up at Eddie from underneath his lashes, hoping that his glasses are working in his favor to make him look more sexy and enticing, not ridiculous and unattractive. 

It seems to be working, because Eddie’s dick visibly _twitches_ in front of him, accidentally brushing the side of Richie’s jaw and Richie would love nothing more than to go to town on it, but Eddie hasn’t said anything and even though Richie’s not expecting Eddie to ask if Richie would be so kind and suck his dick, he’d still appreciate a go-ahead. 

He gets it a second later as Eddie groans out a low ” _Fuck_ , you look so fucking good down there”, before sinking his fingers in to Richie’s curls and it’s a fucking green light if Richie’s ever seen one.

”Of _fuck yes_ ”, Richie lets out, accident more than anything, before he turns his face and takes half of Eddie in to his mouth like it’s no fucking bother at all, and Eddie lets out the most beautiful sound Richie’s ever heard.

It’s his first time sucking dick, _obviously_ , but Richie soon finds that he fucking _loves it_. He doesn't go too far down, not wanting to risk it with his gag reflex, but if the little whines Eddie keeps making every time Richie comes up to lick at his slit are any indication, it seems like he doesn't mind that much.

”Now you’re - oh my god - doing something for me again, I wanted to - fuck, _Richie_ \- do something for you.”

Richie feels quite proud of himself for making Eddie interrupt his own sentence not once, but _twice_ , and he detaches himself from Eddie with a pop and gives him an amused look.

”Eds, if you think this isn’t doing something for me you’re _insane_. I’ve never been so turned on in my _life_.”

Eddie replies something unintelligible, but Richie knows the tone of voice to be one of disbelief, and then Eddie is loosening his grip on Richie’s hair to throw his arm over his face again. Richie frowns, then licks a long stripe on Eddie’s dick from balls to slit, giving it a little kiss before looking back up at Eddie, still hiding under his arm.

”Honestly, Eddie, this is so fucking _hot_. I can't believe you’re letting me do this, what the fuck. I’ve been dreaming of this since I saw you in those _fucking_ shorts, man” Richie goes to press down on his own crotch, trying to relieve some of the tension as he takes a moment to appreciate the memories that pop up. ”The only way this could get better is if you’d like to -”

”I’m not going to choke you with my thighs!” Eddie yelps out, words a bit panicky and quick. ”You could _die_ you absolute fucking idiot, what the fuck would I -”  


”I wasn’t going to ask you to, _Jesus_ don't get your panties in a twist”, Richie interrupts, knowing that Eddie could work himself up to proper panic if not stopped. Eddie’s moved his arm and Richie can see his frown.  


”But earlier you said -”  


”I know what I fucking said - and meant it too - but right now I was going to offer for you to fuck my mouth.”

A beat. Eddie stares.Then -

”Oh.”  


” _Oh_? As in oh please, or as in -”  


”I’m not going to say _please_.”  


”Of course you’re not”, Richie says with a roll of his eyes and licks the underside of Eddie’s dick. ”But if your _Rudeness_ would like to take me up on my offer I’ll just be right here with my mouth all nice and wet and open.”

Richie is looking up from underneath his lashes again, and he can feel spit on his lower lip, and Eddie looks like his mind is short-circuiting, which makes Richie feel positively giddy. He's quite certain that Eddie will say yes and use Richie's mouth like it deserves to be used - but then Eddie seems to wake up from his daze and he's shaking his head.

”No.”

Richie's brain does not compute.

” _No_?”  


”Yeah no, this position is awkward as fuck, we don't have the fucking stamina for that and I haven't even seen you because you're still wearing fucking underwear.”  


”We can change the position, what the -”  


”Then _change_ _it_ ”. Eddie throws his hands up in frustration. Richie does as he’s told, and he moves to kneel in between Eddie's legs rather than lying there. Eddie groans in dissatisfaction.

”I meant a position where you can get _naked_ , have you never fucking done this before?”  


”What part of _repressed_ _homosexual_ with a history of _girlfriends_ did you not get?” Richie shoots back, way more defensively than he intended and he _hates_ it. He didn’t want to bring attention to the fact that he has no idea what he's doing and it terrifies him, letting Eddie know that he’s an inexperienced loser.

Eddie gives him an unimpressed look.

”What, and you think me and my _wife_ had a great _gay_ sex life?”

That shuts Richie up.

”So, you haven’t…”  


” _Obviously_ , I’ve been married to a woman for ten years and - actually never mind that, who the fuck would I have done shit with, you dumbass?” Eddie questions with a roll of his eyes. ”You're the only person I’ve ever thought to do this with. I’ve wanted to touch your junk since I was fucking _thirteen_ and you're being a real dick right now for not letting me.”

Richie is having a hard time coming around the fact that apparently they are _both_ inexperienced losers and therefore he shouldn't have been worried, but he’s having an even harder time processing Eddie’s claim to only ever have wanted to do things with _him_.

Richie wants to say something like ’ _me too, it’s only ever been you for me too_ ’.

”Did you just call _me_ a dick but my dick _junk_?” Is what comes out.  


” _Yes_ , because _you_ are being a dick but I don't know what your dick is like because you are being a selfish _dick_.”  


”Oh please, Eddie, why don’t you tell me how you really feel?”  


Eddie opens his mouth, looking pissed off as ever, but then his expression changes and he’s looking at Richie with an eerily neutral expression.

”Richie”, Eddie says calmly as he moves to sit up slightly, his hand coming to cup the side of Richie’s face. ”I am so, _so_ in love with you. Have been my whole life.”

That knocks Richie’s breath right out of his lungs. Eddie says it like it’s no big deal, like it doesn't matter if he's screaming it for all the world to hear in the middle of the road, or whispering it to no one but them in the privacy of Richie's room - it’s still true. He says it in almost the same tone of voice he used to list diseases with - matter-of-fact and with no room for arguments, just softer and fond. Eddie brushes his thumb under Richie’s glasses, over his cheekbone, and Richie feels himself go boneless.

”Eddie…” he lets out, barely audible.

”I know”, Eddie says, easy as ever, and he leans in and Richie thinks he’s about to kiss him.

He doesn’t. Instead, in one swift movement Eddie sneaks his other arm under Richie’s armpit, throws the other one over his shoulder and yanks him, flipping them so now Richie’s the one lying on his back with Eddie partly on top.

Richie gets out ” _What the_ ” before he’s coughing, trying to get air back into his lungs, and he can feel Eddie detaching them, pulling his arm free from where it was trapped under Richie’s back. By the time he’s done and moved to kneel next to Richie, Richie feels like he can breathe again, and he glares at Eddie.

”Did you just confess your love to me so you could fucking _flip_ us? I thought we were having a moment!” He accuses, pointing a finger at Eddie who slaps his hand away.  


”No, I’ve already confessed dipshit, now I was just repeating it to remind you”, Eddie replies around a sly grin. ”Distracting you was just an added bonus.”  


”That won’t always work, you know.”  


”Are you saying you will grow tired of hearing me say I love you?” Eddie asks, looking amused as he moves his hands over to skim around the edge of Richie’s underwear. 

Richie’s not sure if he should be embarrassed or proud of how hard he still is, after what feels like _hours_ without being touched. His mind had been too preoccupied with the constant _Eddie Eddie Eddie_ to pay any attention to his own situation, but now with Eddie’s full attention on him he was suddenly awfully aware of just how uncomfortable and sticky his underwear had gotten. You could see the outline of his dick very clearly, and Richie idly thinks he has to throw the whole piece of clothing away after, because there's no way the fabric would ever go back to it’s shape, it would just remain too loose at the front to remind him of the time his teenage hormones got to be in charge again.

Eddie is staring at him intently, his fingers absentmindedly toying with the waistband, and Richie’s getting anxious with being looked at. He moves his hand to Eddie's wrist, wrapping his fingers around it gently and it seems to wake Eddie up from whatever daze he’d gotten into.

"You don't have to”, Richie says, because it’s very important to him that Eddie knows he never has to do anything he doesn't want to with him, that Richie is more than okay with whatever he can get. Eddie’s eyes shoot up to meet Richie’s the second the words leave his mouth, and there’s new type of fire and want in them that Richie wasn't prepared for.  


”I _know_ that, I just realized how bad I _want_ to”, Eddie replies, somehow all in a rush but also deliberate and slow, making sure Richie will hear him loud and clear. 

He does, and with a gulp and blown eyes Richie moves his hips up the bed as Eddie’s fingers burn on every place of contact as he pulls the underwear off him. The second they hit the floor Eddie throws his leg over Richie’s, once again going to sit on his thighs. This time he doesn't waste any more time and immediately wraps his hand around Richie, making the other man buckle his hips up instinctively with a hiss. 

”Fuck, Eds -” Richie groans out the same time Eddie exhales ”God, you're so _wet_.”

Richie lets out a breathless laugh at that and tries to reach his hands to touch Eddie, to continue where he'd left off earlier, but Eddie swats his hand away so Richie settles on grabbing his hips instead. He feels so _good_ , not believing that Eddie, fucking _Eddie_ , is sitting on him, jacking him off with such care and expertise that if Richie wouldn’t know any better he’d say he’s had practice.

”I think - ”, Richie starts after a moment of admiring the view ” - it’s very convenient you grew inches in all the right places _except_ your height, since you love climbing me so much.”

Eddie’s movement stops for half a second as his eyebrows shoot up in disbelief.

"I literally have my hand on your dick, how the fuck are you _still talking_.” It's not voiced like a question but Richie answers anyway.  


"It's a talent and a curse. Besides, I wasn't talking when I had something in my mouth”, he points out with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows.  


”Are you honestly complaining right now?” Eddie questions back and moves his hand to Richie’s tip. He starts doing a circular motion, moving his hand back and forts while squeezing just enough to make Richie’s eyes fall shut and ’mother _fucker_ ' leave his mouth.

”What was that?” Eddie sounds pleased with himself and sure enough when Richie opens his eyes again he can see a self-satisfied smirk on his lips. The little asshole.  


”I said motherfucker - you know, me being the fucker and your mom being the mother”, Richie challenges back, and _immediately_ regrets it because Eddie is letting go of his dick and that might be the worst loss Richie's ever felt, 27 years aside.

Richie lets out a whine that he will deny ever making, and Eddie rolls his eyes as he scoots forward, close enough that just an inch more and Richie could grind against his cheeks. His grip on Eddie’s hips tighten at the thought, and Eddie seems to know where his mind has gone as he makes a _nu-uh_ sound before taking Richie’s dick back in hand - this time with his own too, and Richie feels like he's on fucking cloud nine.

Eddie seems to be right there with him - if the grunt he lets out is anything to go by, and he starts jacking them both at the same time. 

But after a moment it becomes clear that it's more awkward than it should be, and not because they'd be different sizes because surprisingly they’re quite compatible, but because Eddie’s hands have always been small and he’s not able to hold both of their dicks properly. Richie is enjoying it anyway, but Eddie looks like he’s getting frustrated so Richie deems it necessary to step in before his dick gets in the line of fire of Eddie’s inevitable frustrated outburst - even though Richie would like to see where that might take the evening, but his also been on the edge for _ever_.

So with one final squeeze to Eddie's hips he moves his hands, wrapping one of them around them both with ease. Eddie groans and his hips jolt towards the contact involuntarily.

”Fuck you, why are your hands so big?” Eddie grumbles, and Richie knows it just out of habit of arguing and he loves it. He smirks and flicks his wrist.  


”Are you honestly complaining right now?” He repeats Eddie’s own words back at him and Eddie seems to notice it too, glaring at Richie before grinding forward again, this time with intent and Richie’s breath catches. He moves his free hand to catch Eddie’s, and laces their fingers together before bringing it to his face, kissing the back of Eddie’s hand.

Eddie’s face softens and Richie feels a blush rise to his cheeks even though he doesn’t really feel embarrassed. He’s touching Eddie's dick, dammit, that gives him the right to hold his hand.

It seems like Eddie’s soft moment is over, because suddenly he moves their joined hands over Richie’s head and leans down, effectively trapping Richie’s other hand between their bodies. Before Richie has time to verbalize the difficulties this brings, Eddie starts moving his hips, bucking them up in slow, steady motions.

Richie groans, and Eddie makes a noise of agreement before catching Richie’s lips in a kiss that’s less of a kiss and more just shared heavy breathing with some tongue. They are still holding hands, and Richie’s grip tightens as Eddie starts to kiss the side of his face, moving down to mouth against his jawline before sucking on the underside of it. He’s still grinding his hips, but it's more erratic and less controlled now, like he's getting closer. 

”God, Eddie, imagine if you were _actually_ riding me”, Richie blurts out. Eddie lets out a whine that sounds slightly like _shut up_ but Richie takes it as the _go on_ it really is. He tightens the grip on their cocks briefly and he can feel Eddie’s gasp against his neck.

”That’d be so fucking hot, I swear I wouldn’t last a fucking minute. You’d be so _tight_ and I'd just want to fuck you until you forgot how to walk” Eddie whimpers again, and his movements have lost all rhythm now. Richie leans his head to the side to talk as close to Eddie’s ear as he can. 

”But you're a little shit so you wouldn’t let me”, Richie says in a low voice. ”Instead you'd just have your wicked little way with me, moving yourself up and down and back and forth and whatever way you like, making sure I hit that sweet spot every time - and I would Eddie, _shit_ , I’d fill you up so fucking good and you would fucking _love it_.”

Eddie’s making noise that sounds just like repetition of Richie’s name - even though Richie’s not sure if that's true or if being so aroused for so long has made him lose all understanding of English language. He doesn't care though, because the friction on his dick is so fucking good and for once he's thankful for his overactive imagination.

”Fuck, I can’t wait.”

And with that, Eddie is coming.

He bucks his hips up for the last time and lets out a sound Richie wants as his fucking ringtone. Richie starts moving his hand again, partly to work Eddie through his orgasm and partly to get there himself. He can feel Eddie twitching in between them, the wetness going absolutely all over both of their stomachs, before Eddie slows his movements down, breathing heavy against Richie's neck.

With great effort Richie does his best to let go of Eddie's dick while still jacking himself off, because he’s not sure if Eddie would appreciate being played with when he's sensitive, and Richie’s not about to ask when he’s _so_ close himself.

Eddie seems to catch on the fact too, and he moves his face from where it’d been pressed against Richie's neck for quite a while to look at the man under him. 

”Fuck, Richie, what do you want?”  


”I don’t - I don't know, fuck, Eddie, anything, I’m so fucking - _Eddie_ ”, Richie gasps back, unable to form a coherent sentence but he doesn't have to, because suddenly Eddie is holding his face and moving his lips to his ear, kissing the lobe before -

”Richie, I love you.”

And Richie whites out.

After what simultaneously feels like forever and not nearly long enough, Richie's coming down from the best orgasm of his life to find Eddie staring at him with eyes blown wide. They just stare at each other, Richie grimacing slightly as he lets go of his sensitive and absolutely soaked dick, before he takes a moment to be thankful for somehow miraculously still having his glasses on. 

They are still holding hands.

”Fuck, if that wouldn't have been the hottest thing I’ve _ever_ seen I would make fun of you so hard for coming right after I told you I love you”, Eddie breaks the silence and Richie blinks, not having expected that.  


”Oh shut up, you're one to talk- you came from _dirty talk_ ”, he shoots back. ”Apparently _this_ trashmouth is good for something, huh”, he adds with a raise of his brow.  


”Jury’s still out on that one”, Eddie deadpans. ”Besides, dirty talk is, like, _common_.”  


”Well I'm sure _love_ is also a common factor in happy, loving relationships”, Richie points out, his brow dropping back down to frown. ”Not that I'd have any frame of reference, mind you. I suppose you’d know better.” Eddie sends him a flat look.  


”I don’t.”

It’s not a conversation they should be having sticky and on top of each other - or at _all_ during the afterglow. So Eddie rolls over to his side, letting go of Richie's hand in the process. Richie feels the loss in more ways than physical, so after a bit of maneuvering he has his arm around Eddie who is resting his head on Richie’s bicep. They’re side by side, Eddie lying on his back now with one of his legs in between Richie’s.

A moment passes with neither of them saying anything as they get their heartbeats back to normal, but the silence isn’t uncomfortable. Somewhere in the back of his mind Richie realizes that it's the first time after any kind of sexual interaction that he _doesn't_ want to throw up or flee or like in most cases, both. It makes him feel good, if not a bit terrified at the same time, getting the confirmation that oh yeah, _this_ is what everyone’s talking about. He turns his head to the side, wanting to tell Eddie, but he finds the other man staring very pointedly at the ceiling with a tense expression.

Richie's first thought is ’ _oh shit he regrets this_ ’ and his stomach drops at the thought, but then he notices Eddie’s fingers twitching where his hand is lying in the small space between them and - _oh_.

”You’re thinking about the drying cum on your stomach, aren't you?” Richie asks, not being able to hide the amusement in his voice. He can see Eddie’s expression change and the tension somewhat leave his body, and Richie realizes Eddie was relieved for Richie noticing his discomfort. He was trying to stay calm about the mess on his stomach for Richie's sake, which would have been sweet if it wasn’t for the way he glared at him now.

”Why do you have to be so crude?”  


”What?” Richie asks, confused because doesn’t Eddie know him at _all_? ”What did I say no- _cum_?”  


Eddie’s grimace was telling enough and Richie moves to lie on his side now, leaning against his hand so he can look down at Eddie’s now reddening face.  


”Interesting, what would you prefer, Eddiekins?” He asks, grinning. ”Sperm? Jizz? Seed? Love nectar?”  


” _Love nectar_?” Eddie whisper-shouts, sounding way too scandalized for a man with two loads of said thing sticking to his stomach. Richie grins wider.  


”Oh you like that, do you?” He asks in his best impression of a bad pornstar.  


” _No_!” Eddie shrieks, and immediately looks like he wants to fucking smack himself - he should know better than to rise to Richie's baits.  


”Don't worry babe, I have plenty more!” Richie tries to sound reassuring, but he's finding this too hilarious to succeed. ”You know, spunk, blast, baby batter -”  


”I beg of you.”  


”- cream, load, nut, _dick milk_.”

Eddie lets out a sound of disgust and looks so offended that Richie burst out laughing. He could go on, he really could, but he’s having difficulty to stop laughing and Eddie staring at him with a highly unimpressed look doesn’t help.

”I hope you know that no judge would charge me with your murder after I tell them this conversation”, Eddie deadpans and it sets Richie off all over again. He can see Eddie’s lips start to twitch too, and it's always been the best reward, getting Eddie to smile. It calms Richie down somewhat, because he can’t stare at Eddie's smile if he’s giggling like a maniac, so after Eddie rolls his eyes and calls him an idiot, they just end up staring each other again with dumb smiles on their faces. 

It doesn't last long though, and Richie can pinpoint the exact moment Eddie remembers his discomfort as his nose scrunches up and he pouts his lips. 

”This is disgusting”, Eddie says, glancing down at his stomach like it has offended him greatly. Richie’s starting to get uncomfortable too and he knows in a minute it will hurt like a bitch to get the cum off his happy trail. He doesn’t want to say that to Eddie though, not wanting to give into his clean-freak tendencies, so he just rolls his eyes and rolls over to his back, throwing his hand over the side of the bed to grab the first piece of clothing it can find.

He’s delighted to find that it's Eddies pajama top, and he rolls back to his side, hoisting himself up to lean over his elbow.

”What are you -” Eddie’s eyes widen comically after he spots what Richie’s holding. ”Oh no, _no_ , do not fucking - Richie I swear to _God_ if you - DO NOT -”

Richie looks him dead in the eyes as he brings the shirt to his stomach, wiping it nice and clean with it. Then, using Eddie’s shock to his advance, wipes his stomach too. That seems to wake Eddie up, and he slaps Richie’s hand way harder than necessary.

”I can’t _believe_ you did that!” Eddie shrieks.  


”I can’t believe you thought I _wouldn’t_ ”, Richie retorts, raising his eyebrow as if to say _really_? as he drops the shirt back to the floor. ”I mean in any case I was planning on burning it first thing in the morning because I hate it and everything it stands for, but now it’s even better because you can join in and hold the lighter and we can make a nice little moment out of it.”

Eddie stares at him like he’s grown a second head.

”Everything it _stands for_? It’s a fucking shirt.”  


”Yes, and it stood between me and your _abs_ ”, Richie says like it's obvious and Eddie's just being an idiot.  


”Seriously, are my abs like, a _thing_ for you?” Eddie asks, glancing down at himself with a quizzical look.  


”Eddie”, Richie replies in a calm voice, waiting for the other man to look at him again to make sure he's really listening. ”If I wouldn’t have _just_ gotten rid of all the babies in me I would have cum again just from seeing your stomach covered in said babies.”

Eddie’s face goes through a range of emotions in the span of few seconds, settling on something between offended and disgusted. He scrunches his face up and groans ”Ugh, _gross_ ”, but since Richie’s an expert on all things Eddie he can hear the underlying amusement too. 

”And if I would have had _any_ energy left I would have fucking licked you squeaky clean too”, Richie adds, and Eddie lets out an exasperated sigh, before suddenly shoving Richie’s chest.  


”C’mon asshole, under the covers, I’m fucking freezing.”

Richie stares at Eddie with a dopey look for a moment before doing as he’s told, sliding under the covers as Eddie does the same by his side. It makes Richie feel all warm inside - like he’s in a fucking Netflix original or some shit - to know that Eddie not only slept with him, but will _sleep_ with him. 

They end up in a position much like the one from before, with Richie on his back his arm wrapped around Eddie, who’s thrown a leg in between Richie’s once again. But instead of lying on his back, Eddie’s on his side now, using Richie’s chest as a pillow with his arm thrown over Richie’s middle.

”You’re very cuddly aren’t you?” Richie teases, pressing a soft kiss to the top of Eddie’s head so he knows he doesn't mind.  


”Shut up, I told you I’m freezing”, Eddie mumbles against his chest, nuzzling somehow closer.  


”Well, you _are_ naked”, Richie points out very unhelpfully, which Eddie seems to agree with since he moves his head to look at him with a very unimpressed look.  


”Well, I _had_ pajamas.”

Richie lets out a long-suffering sigh.  


”If you must wear fucking pajamas, I’ll get you the velcro ones.” He tries to sound irritated, but it's a lost cause since he can't stop smiling.  


”Those don’t _exist_ you idiot”, Eddie shoots back, trying - and failing to match Richie’s tone, while also doing a bad job hidingthe smile tugging at his lips.  


”Well then I will invest in them so they do - after all, I _am_ filthy rich”, Richie replies with a cocky grin and Eddie snorts.  


”I think in order to get rich from being funny you would have to, I don’t know, _be funny_?” He deadpans and Richie grins so hard it hurts his cheeks.

”If anything, people must pay you to shut the fuck up”, Eddie adds, trying to look serious but the twinkle in his eyes gives him away. ”I know _I_ would, if you wouldn't just fucking milk me dry and then _still_ make a dumb joke.”  


Richie laughs ”I thought I just did”. He leans closer, startling Eddie who blinks at him in confusion.  


”What?”  


Richie brushes their noses together, making a content sound at the back of his head before smirking out an explanation. 

”Milk you dry.”  


Richie sneaks in a quick kiss before Eddie swats him away with a groan.  


”What did I _just_ say?”

Richie laughs again, feeling lighter than he has in 27 years, possibly ever. Eddie glares at him one last time before settling himself back down against Richie’s chest while mumbling something unintelligible.

”What was that?"  


”I _hate_ that you were right.” Eddie sounds annoyed - not in a real way, more like he’s just slightly displeased.  


”Right about what?”  


”About having a big dick.”

Richie lets out a surprised laugh because that was definitely not what he expected to hear. ” _What_?”  


”Yeah, _fuck you_ for that, by the way”, Eddie grumbles out, pinching Richie’s side. ”It’s not fucking fair.”  


”Eds -”  


”Don’t call me that.”  


”- be a dear and walk me through this thought process.” Richie moves the hand not currently drawing circles on Eddie’s shoulder to catch his hand. Eddie lets him, but not before pinching Richie's side once more, making the other man wince.  


”You’re such a little shit”, Richie mumbles and entwines their fingers.

Eddie is quiet long enough for Richie to think he’s dropped the conversation, not willing to share what’s on his mind. Richie doesn’t mind, willing to add whatever Eddie was on about to the ever growing _later-_ pile in his mind, but then Eddie sighs.

”I used to think about it.”  


”About what?”

Richie can feel the glare even if he can’t see it.

”Your _dick_ , asshole. I used to think about it, and not just when you were talking about it - which was fucking _nonstop_ , I mean I get it we were all fucking hormonal teenagers but c’m _on_ Richie you were insufferable.”  


”I remember _someone_ saying earlier how that was a real lovable quality of mine”, Richie points out with a smirk and Eddie very pointedly ignores him.

”When you were being a jackass - which was pretty much always - I used to think _God_ , _I wish he’s overcompensating and it’s actually fucking tiny_ ” Eddie’s going a bit pink, Richie can tell because he feels the heat on his chest. ”But sometimes, when I was feeling brave - or weak, as I thought at the time - I thought about it, and what you probably did with it and what I’d like to do with it and I would get all hot and bothered and come so hard that one time my mom actually took me to a hospital because she checked on me like a minute after I was done, and I was still all red and hot and incoherent.”

Eddie is proper red now, embarrassment clear as day, but for once Richie's not about to tease him about it. He’s too busy picturing it, little Eddie jacking off to the thoughts of _him_ , fucking teenage Richie, so hard that Mrs. K went to check on him. She must have heard Eddie making some noise, because it took her at least three minutes to come up the stairs - Richie knew from all the times he had to escape through the window, always counting down to the last possible moment to throw himself out in time - and Richie couldn’t believe Eddie risked doing that while his mom was home.

But maybe it had been the same for Eddie as it had been for Richie. Sometimes, when he’d just learned about the magical world of masturbation and his hormones were all over the place, it had felt like he would actually _die_ if he didn’t get to jack off, and those times the time and place really didn't matter. One of these instances was when they were having a sleepover at Bill’s, and Eddie had come out of the shower in nothing but those _fucking_ red shorts, and Richie - who had been in the middle of telling how he didn’t have to shower because they had been swimming all day - had just fucking _bolted_ to the bathroom without a word because he really didn't want to cum in front of his friends. Bill's bathroom was another thing altogether. 

Richie’s just about to tell Eddie that story so he can ask for his opinion if he should tell Bill when he's in the middle of eating or drinking, when a thought enters his slightly aroused mind.

”Wait, let me get this straight”, Richie starts, trying to pull Eddie’s shoulder to make him look up. ”You were simultaneously fantasizing about getting to ride the Tozier train -” Eddie groans ”- but wishing I was _lying_ about my size?”  


”I didn’t want to _ride_ the Tozier train - what the fuck does that even mean, I wouldn't have let you come anywhere fucking _near_ my ass back then, what the fuck. I’d barely let you do it now.”  


”Oh you _know_ what that means”, Richie smirks before Eddie’s words catch up. ”Wait, hold on, you’d _let_ me?” Richie squeaks out and this time when he pulls Eddie’s shoulder the other man looks up, and he’s still blushing.

” _Focus_ , fuckface”, Eddie says, and it’s clear he wants Richie to move on as if in _any_ universe that would happen.  


”On _what_? On you being open to the idea of my _dick_ in your _ass_?”

Eddie sighs loudly and looks up. ”Why, oh why did I have to pick the one with the filthiest mouth?” He asks the room - or God, Richie’s not really sure about adult-Eddie's beliefs. Another thing for _later_.

”Well _someone_ has to say the actual words when you’re just being a fucking tease, _jeez_ I feel like I’m fourteen again watching you tryout for the track team”, Richie grumbles out in a defensive tone. ”Those fucking shorts, man.” 

Eddie raises his brow at him, which makes Richie’s brain catch with his words. He definitely didn’t mean to say the last part, but now he just shrugs, not embarrassed about the admission of his teenage lust, because if Eddie hadn’t caught on by now what his sexual awakening had been it was about time.

” _And_!” Richie suddenly adds, louder than necessary like it’s an afterthought. ”Stop bitching about my mouth, I literally talked you to an orgasm earlier.”

Eddie’s turning crimson again as he immediately tears his gaze away from Richie’s, embarrassment clear as day as he presses his face against Richie’s neck now, mumbling something Richie really can’t hear but which sends nice shivers down his spine anyway.

”Want to share with the rest of us, Spagheds?” He asks, and can feel Eddie bite down supposedly because of the nickname. It feels like rewarding bad behavior, but Richie’s not about to point that out.

”It wasn’t the dirty talk”, Eddie says after a moment, and Richie frowns, not sure what he's on about.  


”What?”  


”What made me, you know…”

Eddie stops himself, sounding very flustered which makes Richie feel quite pleased. 

”Repeat my name in the sexiest voice known to man as you ejaculated all over our naked bodies?” He asks in a matter-of-fact tone, and brings their still entwined hands to his mouth to press a kiss against Eddie’s.  


”Oh my God fucking beep beep you jackass”, Eddie groans, but his words loose all meaning as he squeezes Richie’s hand. ”But yeah, _that_.”

Richie sends him an unimpressed look.  


”Are you seriously going to look me dead in the eyes and tell me you _didn't_ like that? In front of God and your dear mot-”  


”Jesus Christ Richie, the woman’s _dead_ , show some respect - and for the love of all things holy _never_ bring her up in bed again.”

Eddie sounds like he's actually quite annoyed, so Richie gives a kiss to his wrist to calm him down. Eddie glares, and after a few seconds Richie feels safe enough to keep talking because if he doesn’t he might start overthinking Eddie saying the words _bed_ and _again_.

”What can I say Eds, Mrs. K and I shared something very beautiful and I cherish those moments to this day."

Eddie stares at him and blinks.

”Brave words from someone within a stabbing distance”, he says in a flat tone, removing his hand from Richie’s.  


”You don’t have a knife”, Richie points out, but his gaze follows Eddie’s now free hand just to make sure. It settles down on Richie’s chest, making him let out a relieved sigh.

”Most stab injuries happen from everyday objects, such as pens”, Eddie says, placing his head on his hand.  


”You’re _naked_ , so the only thing you can stab me with is your -” Richie starts, feeling safe enough now that he can be sure Eddie's not _actually_ going to stab him.  


”How was it like to get to your forties while never finishing puberty?” Eddie interrupts him, not unsurprisingly.  


”Don’t know, why don’t you tell me after you can reach the top shelf”, Richie quips back automatically, and Eddie pinches him before moving his hand from underneath his head, starting to rub it absentmindedly over Richie’s chest.

”As I was _trying_ to tell you earlier”, Eddie starts after a moment and Richie wonders if that’s blush creeping up his face again or if he’s just imagining things. ”I liked the dirty talk, alright? But it wasn’t what did it though.”  


”What was?”

Silence, and then -

”You saying you can’t wait for that to happen.”

Eddie says it against Richie’s chest, almost like he’s ashamed - which is fucking _ridiculous_ , because Richie’s the one to vocally fantasize about Eddie to the man in question, it should be _him_ to be embarrassed. 

”Really?” Richie asks, not putting it past him to not misunderstand literally everything from the past ten minutes - or the whole evening to be honest.  


”Yeah, I…” Eddie starts, stopping to take a breath. ”I really liked that.”  


”Why?” Eddie sends Richie an unimpressed look and he just shrugs apologetically. ”I think you're underestimating how much of an idiot I am Eds.”  


”Don't call me that”, Eddie mumbles back automatically before he sighs. ”I wasn't sure if you were like, I don’t know, getting it out of your system. But then you said that and it made me hopeful that maybe… maybe after, well, whatever happens tomorrow, we could… I don't know, do that?”

It sounds like Eddie didn’t mean to finish with that, like he was going to say something else and then deflected. Part of Richie wants to ask, but bigger part of him already knows the answer.

He’s silent for a second or two before gently kissing the top of Eddie’s head. 

”Yeah, I think we could”, Richie says. ”And I think we should, too”, he adds after Eddie makes a content noise against him. ”Because I wasn’t lying when I said I can’t wait - not only because I’ve wanted to get all up in your ass since -”

” _Richie_.”

Eddie raises his head to glare at Richie who rolls his eyes.

”Yeah fine, whatever, silence my confession of love -”  


”To my _ass_?”  


”To _you_ , if you would just let me fucking finish -”  


”I wouldn't _have_ to interrupt if you’d just get to the point -”

Richie makes an exasperated sound before he stares Eddie straight in the eyes and says, in the most matter-of-fact voice he can ”I can’t wait, because I can’t wait to fall asleep with you and wake up with you and do all the godawful domestic shit with you.” Eddie blinks and Richie stares harder. ”I can’t wait to get to know _this_ you and I can’t wait for you to drive me absolutely up the fucking wall with all the new insanity you must have picked up, and I can’t wait for all the inventive ways you plan to kill me when I dare to leave a dirty plate in the sink for a day or abide by the five-second rule. I can’t wait for -”

”You wouldn’t” Eddie cuts in, because _of course he does_.  


”What?” Richie tries to think back on his own words, frowning. ”The five-second rule?” he asks and Eddie gives him a pointed look. Richie can't believe him. ”Dude, you’ve seen me eat a worm off the ground.”  


”When you were _ten_ ”, Eddie exclaims and he’s once again staring at Richie like’s he’s insane. It only fuels Richie’s fire.  


”Let’s go outside right the fuck now, I’ll do it again bitch, don’t test me.”  


”I’m not testing you, what the fuck, why can’t we ever focus - also, _don’t fucking do that_.”  


”I was focusing, you interrupted me! _Again_!”  


”You were insinuating that you eat food off the ground!”  


”That's because I _do_!”

Eddie's moved up to hold himself up by his forearm now, other hand flat on Richie’s chest. He’s looking slightly down at Richie, whose hand is still on his shoulder but has stopped his movements now, and he's staring at Eddie with fire in his eyes and challenge clear as day on his face.

”Richie”, Eddie starts, and moves his hand slowly upwards. ”I want to make this perfectly clear.” His voice is calm and he doesn't take his eyes off of Richie’s as he goes to cup his cheek. Richie’s face softens immediately as he leans against Eddie's palm. ”I will never, _ever_ kiss you after you’ve eaten something off the ground. Ever.”  


”How would you know when I’ve done that?” Richie argues back immediately and Eddie throws him an unimpressed look.  


”Because I plan to never leave your side again, dickwad, because I want all that sappy shit you just said, too.”

Richie's mouth opens in a silent _oh_ and Eddie looks pleased, the side of his mouth quirking up. 

”Okay”, Richie says after he’s swallowed down the sudden lump in his throat. ”I think that sounds like a fair deal.”  


”You _think_?” Eddie teases and Richie rolls his eyes.  


”Yeah Eds, I think I can cut down on my worm-intake if it means I’ll get to have some spaghetti instead.”

Eddie scrunches his nose in annoyance, but he also smiles, soft and private and so loving that Richie feels the lump make a reappearance. He wants to ask Eddie to lean down and kiss him, but doesn’t get that far when Eddie’s already doing so, pressing their lips together in possibly the sweetest kiss so far. Richie moves his free hand to cup Eddie’s cheek, thumb grazing over his cheekbone, and Eddie makes a pleased sound against Richie's lips before slowly detaching them, pecking Richie once more before lying back down against his chest.

They stay like that, with Eddie’s leg in between Richie’s and his hand thrown over Richie’s stomach, head resting on his chest, and Richie realizes it's the quietest they've been since that walk back to the townhouse what feels like a lifetime ago now. Suddenly Richie feels exhausted, so bonelessly tired that he’s surprised it's taken his body this long to catch up with everything. It feels like the longest day of his life, while also somehow being over way too quickly, and Richie really doesn’t want to think about going back to… _whatever_ reality has in store for them tomorrow.

Eddie’s mind seems to be on the same topic.

”What now?” He asks, tentative and quiet like he’s afraid if he talks too loud something might happen.  


”I think now…” Richie replies slowly, not sure what to say before he feels Eddie yawn against him. ”We sleep”, he finishes, squeezing Eddie and getting a sleepy murmur as an answer. Eddie seems to be on the verge of falling asleep, which makes Richie feel all warm inside, because it’s so _Eddie_ to be arguing and talking mile a minute one moment, and the next be _this_ , soft and sleepy and comfy. It makes Richie feel all mushy and stupid, so he adds ”Or at least I will. You can come up with excuses for your hickeys.”

”You gave me _hickeys_?” Eddie shrieks, suddenly wide awake again, and he’s way too loud for the situation so Richie shushes him.  


”Not yet, but I’m planning on it in the morning”, he explains after watching Eddie move his fingers all over his neck, as if he’d be able to feel the hickeys.

”Dude, we’re _forty_ ”, Eddie sighs out after he seems to be satisfied with his hickey-free neck.  


”I _know_ ” Richie says deliberately like Eddie is being dumb. ”That’s why I have to give my a-game! I made a shitty new first impression with the others, so I’m planning my new new first impression to be ’ _oh yeah, Trashmouth's still got it_ ’.”

Richie can feel Eddie rolling his eyes and it makes Richie feel way better than it should.

”You don’t got shit”, Eddie argues, but it doesn’t sound convincing in the slightest since he finishes with a yawn.  


”I got you”, Richie points out, and it's meant to sound teasing but comes out fond instead.

Eddie's quiet for a moment, and Richie wonders briefly if he has fallen asleep, but then there's a grunt and he hears a low ”I fucking hate that it’s true.” Richie snorts, because Eddie _does_ sound annoyed, but in the best way possible. It’s the same way he used to tell Richie he's not funny after accidentally laughing out loud at one of his jokes. It’s the same way he used to tell Richie to fuck off after he’d helped him calm down after an attack. 

It’s the same way he used to say _I love you_ without saying the words.

”Eddie?”  


”Mhm?”  


”Do I? Got you, now?”

They've had this conversation before, not more than a few minutes ago. But then there was arguing and talk about eating worms and even though it was very _them_ , this is something Richie’s wanted since he knew what wanting was, and he can’t help but ask for another confirmation.

He kind of feels like they’re in school and he’s pushing a piece of paper to Eddie with the words ” _do you like me_ ” written on it, or maybe even ” _do you want to be my boyfriend_ ”, with two boxes underneath - one for yes, one for no.

”Yeah, Rich. You got me. Always have.”

And with that, with Eddie’s check on the _yes_ box Richie finally closes his eyes, and eventually drifts off to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> There you go! I can’t believe I just wrote almost 17k that was pretty much just porn with some bickering in it, but hey, when it’s these two dumbasses, what can you do! This was also my first ever time writing smut so be kind, I was having a bit of trouble with you know, limbs and their placements throughout the whole thing so if there were any points where you were like ’wait, that’s not possible’, I’m sorry.
> 
> I have another Reddie fic too, it’s a nice little 3k about Richie being a mess by Eddie’s hospital bed before their happily ever after, so if that sounds like something you’d like go have a look!
> 
> Also just a lovely afterthought, even though this doesn’t cover it I want to be perfectly clear of the fact that after the events that occurred in this fic, Eddie survives like the tough and brave motherfucker he is and Stephen King can suck my dick. And the reason why Stan isn’t mentioned is because he was on his way to the restaurant after taking a nice and refreshing shower, and Stephen King can still suck my dick.
> 
> By the way, I am aware that most stab wounds are from knives, but for the purpose of this fic let’s ignore that.


End file.
